|
- 帖子
- 83
- 精華
- 0
- 威望
- 33
- 魅力
- 0
- 讚好
- 0
|
1#
發表於 2007-8-7 12:24 PM
| 只看該作者
HR MEMO
To all Employees:9 s! U8 X3 h: T% `
> > Effective January 2007) e$ Z- ^( ?3 u3 O) h, O
> >
: e& y% P _# e> > Dress Code9 \$ C/ Z0 {7 w
> > 1. It is advised that you come to work dressed
, k6 G4 j0 L1 |/ R k. }> > according to your salary. If we see you wearing, s& L8 [. g/ h( a4 R
> > Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we assume7 G/ i- @# w: Y' N+ k$ ]
> > you are doing well financially and therefore do not+ g# z" L" q8 U3 V8 K( u4 w
> > need a pay raise.
) v" A' o4 n: v7 Y# S. F* q |> > 2. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage
* t' M( B9 Z: m q> > your money better, so that you may buy nicer* g# i: u7 V6 b
> > clothes, and therefore you do not need a pay raise.+ F8 D8 I# o% G8 K
> > 3. If you dress just right, you are right where you
" E7 j( s1 Z1 m1 F+ f> > need to be and therefore you do not need a pay
5 t1 F! g/ v. A9 y3 o, V3 Q> > raise.
6 w4 y% z* h+ M> >
9 Y) H) D3 g5 r3 g- {3 J9 j> > Sick Days
( C) E+ u& W5 K* i5 d> > We will no longer accept a doctor's certificate as
! \. W5 t8 l9 n+ V X% a9 v> > proof of sickness.
" N& T! x! p6 ^+ U2 j8 b/ }' ?> > If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able( t( S6 J3 y1 p
> > to come to work.
# t# k7 O* a' m0 F> >( t$ N- g+ j' t. \- C* d2 m
> > Holiday Days
( S( s' j, s" f, m, a- `+ N> > Each employee will receive 104 personal days a: C3 @( X% n' i. ]8 g4 [ t
> > year. They are called Saturday & Sunday." C" a0 d2 J6 r! Z7 v3 D
> >
0 G4 A: q! y1 C) U0 L1 c2 d) t> > Compassionate Leave( ] m7 z6 s( ?, ~* k5 X/ m# H) a
> > This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing
( L! f) q* @7 v/ i> > you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-
6 I/ _& \: Y- {: r- ^* E> > workers. Every effort should be made to have non-
7 H/ u' k7 E0 \$ K> > employees attend to the arrangements.% G/ a* K& L! s
> > In rare cases where employee involvement is: i m% m5 y# }7 @
> > necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the
% c3 g& j! p$ z& S6 j: s> > late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work
0 l& J& A0 p' y7 R' O8 W> > through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one
) ?+ D) P2 \( B> > hour early.& s9 z$ J7 d6 A% X+ G8 F* Z6 {
> >
. ~; F' A* d4 c8 E7 v& t> > Toilet Use' V- o" y' \$ B( W0 |
> > 1. Entirely too much time is being spent in the
; i: Z# v, W1 _+ P( G1 T2 E> > toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit
4 T7 U; b3 Y! Z* D> > in the cubicles.- U6 c, w* Y; l6 H6 p
> > 2. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will
, b9 o4 E0 N1 W5 H" i> > sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the cubicle
3 C* j- \1 `) L! n2 p: E> > door will open, and your picture will be taken.# W! i1 C) O$ V% Q3 c" S
> > 3. After your second offence, your picture will be- }# [2 T5 \/ ~+ v4 ]& ?% [+ r
> > posted on the company notice board under the! Z- }* O. y+ T' M
> > "Chronic Offenders" category.
, [' C; }- @$ s2 r8 }+ Q> > 4. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be3 W$ ]& D: x7 A4 ~- p
> > sanctioned under the company's mental health) A8 x0 X; `$ H9 i. S! S- L
> > policy.
i$ e' h+ |! h- j: D7 e* p/ p) c> >
9 i7 T7 z. q$ W0 K9 w% u> > Lunch Break
! r5 h$ P2 V, `4 I( B> > 1. Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they
0 A2 A' k% S! ]- _4 y> > need to eat more so that they can look healthy.3 f: q( l/ y! O7 Q' _2 x. p+ {
> > 2. Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to
. e3 _! O. h, C; V" V> > maintain their average figure.
% j! z, \4 ~/ d3 w, w" e# j# v> > 3. Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time' K$ R- v+ S5 m7 Q; B
> > needed to drink a Slim-Fast.
- P3 e6 @* |2 U8 X8 s2 B% u> > Thank you for your loyalty to our company. Remember we are( u( `4 e Y9 p8 i+ | t
> > an employer of choice and we are here to provide a positive* V0 M1 L; v0 r& R; o5 v2 F" S- b
> > employment experience.
$ r7 L2 s6 @0 O5 k> > Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints,) W O7 b! g6 v$ C5 o
> > frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations,. \& L, A# E' y3 D1 w, C
> > accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be% i' M. s& k! W* X$ \ @
> > directed elsewhere. |
|
