|
- 帖子
- 83
- 精華
- 0
- 威望
- 33
- 魅力
- 0
- 讚好
- 0
|
1#
發表於 2007-8-7 12:24 PM
| 只看該作者
HR MEMO
To all Employees: F" W7 z( l' {7 S
> > Effective January 2007: ?; M/ ~3 X% q5 ~* Z* L1 f$ z0 G. X
> >
5 v$ G8 C% q9 X4 d8 [> > Dress Code
) s0 W. N' f! o& A$ h> > 1. It is advised that you come to work dressed" \0 y+ C0 G0 u5 m: n7 l, C# K
> > according to your salary. If we see you wearing
d% {; ~. j6 i$ C# Q> > Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we assume
: \1 W: y1 L2 k% J7 L: w, i8 ~/ N! X> > you are doing well financially and therefore do not
% g& o0 u3 U8 s( Z8 D> > need a pay raise.
4 M- e; K4 K; K. |> > 2. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage& p' d& U) Z! B8 }0 h' I
> > your money better, so that you may buy nicer4 b$ a4 N' T2 k
> > clothes, and therefore you do not need a pay raise.
: }8 Q% k8 l$ n( b& w y> > 3. If you dress just right, you are right where you9 a' z7 G, S z6 [
> > need to be and therefore you do not need a pay
1 `" v2 {; d: g% y9 ~' Z7 Q> > raise.
; V" a" c4 H6 y/ W5 W> >
' Y/ A% y! p& ~> > Sick Days7 ?; f; f5 p! ]% }+ ~8 {
> > We will no longer accept a doctor's certificate as; |% k6 V3 u* Z
> > proof of sickness.
" W: S3 j& g/ Z8 O4 R, G> > If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able
7 k% U; @& ]7 i- l> > to come to work.
Z! W% D* ^8 {; |> >
" o/ G) g2 [/ I3 T/ Q! _> > Holiday Days
" {5 `6 t1 @0 Z+ G> > Each employee will receive 104 personal days a- g2 b+ B7 x5 f) n1 F
> > year. They are called Saturday & Sunday.
6 ^' }. y) z% N! L2 X, r' K> >
* W" g$ ]! I. W/ t! }2 A" F8 Y> > Compassionate Leave, W- R; R5 k1 {, V3 F2 P4 Q
> > This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing8 }9 q- P" P, f9 T# V
> > you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-
3 R% T2 Z6 i7 T8 y6 N> > workers. Every effort should be made to have non- I5 i, \' L* { m
> > employees attend to the arrangements.0 z. r2 p! F8 P3 t3 M
> > In rare cases where employee involvement is
' M9 `6 }) f; Y/ a0 E> > necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the* C" T, d( U2 N3 @# D7 ~
> > late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work
( l3 j L# Z) B6 z$ q4 Z& X> > through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one
( s, u( ]5 {5 L$ _7 B> > hour early.
3 p5 C/ z; e4 l> >" R* R: y8 ~' M" D. f- w2 ~
> > Toilet Use
1 J5 x h0 t9 {' m; Z$ Y; j> > 1. Entirely too much time is being spent in the) V; m& V7 B( x) _5 w
> > toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit# j: ^! w% `# j' x1 }' [
> > in the cubicles.
5 I1 Y) z. \# I3 b3 z+ Y7 v> > 2. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will3 K9 A4 }6 E2 `* Y
> > sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the cubicle
8 ?" T2 P4 g. j> > door will open, and your picture will be taken.9 Y2 E7 ~- {0 a! T* s
> > 3. After your second offence, your picture will be
4 t! x+ n* x/ ~ ^> > posted on the company notice board under the0 [! G( @0 ]2 U2 C, k: T7 `: d: G
> > "Chronic Offenders" category.
; r" B# S; M! r% u% e> > 4. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be& s, b& ]5 k( ~; X; g
> > sanctioned under the company's mental health& E ?; u) {" X6 H. H
> > policy.9 q! _+ p) M) S3 u# _, H
> >
, o& O) s/ i" s2 Y0 l( Y> > Lunch Break' u8 {' f) I3 K/ E
> > 1. Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they a7 D/ q+ e, R' x7 r' E5 ^
> > need to eat more so that they can look healthy.- A* {' o* s, V. S
> > 2. Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to) ?/ B% l7 V' d6 Q
> > maintain their average figure., R, y6 y" F$ y) {' m
> > 3. Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time/ x3 [3 F* c; \" O8 M
> > needed to drink a Slim-Fast.7 l/ b8 I) R8 Y7 i) I
> > Thank you for your loyalty to our company. Remember we are- q1 M1 u' }# U6 y
> > an employer of choice and we are here to provide a positive
, e0 s( e1 f$ V* ?1 H1 U1 T> > employment experience.
% ?/ g. i4 [) T0 j- u% k> > Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints,& h9 F" K( c: t/ L# v
> > frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations,8 _! s" S4 g9 ~8 O2 L$ q) U
> > accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be' A& |2 b1 b) a7 h1 u2 R' H
> > directed elsewhere. |
|
