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[English]: Jokes..

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' u9 o5 S* {% B" D; E2 ~1) A recent survey asked 100 sexually active men what they most enjoyed about a blow job
8 g- K5 P. p8 k6 B: a* v/ I/ s8 r- @99.9% of them said, the 10 minutes of silence
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2) Advantages of having an affair with a married woman?/ J2 P1 W$ D5 U& O& q
a.They give like hell. ; E& O% j7 X, D. M! t
b.They do not yell.& ~* V) D: {  O3 z) H
c.They do not tell.1 P- D3 ~! H6 N" _) r
d.They do not swell and there is no wedding bell., S) \3 Z+ L$ B( ]

8 e: y- K$ K& l& w/ s) D* G; K9 S" o3) A woman once said that a man is like a deck of playing cards. You need:
6 k4 Q& u7 [# s" j6 z4 `- a HEART to love him,. e0 ?7 H- I  t. ?; p
- a DIAMOND to marry him,
( }' G: y: d- t# x- a CLUB to smash his head in, and
3 I1 f# ]& S! Z- Z- a SPADE to bury him!
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0 B( x% v( I2 O& x' H  a5 ~* _; O9 \4) What is the similarity between a wife and a chewing gum?) e+ q3 Z# \# [  Z1 Z1 l- O
Both are sweet in the beginning and become tasteless and shapeless later
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# h) o$ u) F5 n# x5) What is the strongest muscle?
$ d7 }- b7 \& a8 BThe tongue. It can raise a woman’s hip with just one lick!
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$ ~2 K7 M- I* K1 u& u$ ?0 r: A" g6) Why is the 69 position like driving in rush hour?4 j$ |5 Z! ^4 y& t
The arse hole is always in front of you.7 J* P6 X5 _$ V8 m

$ ?. }/ H' [, i- U7) What is the difference between a panty & a stage curtain?
  \" P4 i7 G0 e/ R4 W3 \2 XWhen you pull down the stage curtain, the show is over.. but when you pull down the panties, it’s SHOWTIME!# e( c2 v! d2 b* p- E/ a! ~! N

+ t8 d5 t: R  i; I8) A divorced man meets his ex-wife’s new husband at a party. Later after knocking back a few drinks, he goes over to the new guy and asks him: So... how do you like using second hand stuff?
& I* e  M2 {+ aThe new husband replied: It isn’t that bad. Past the first three inches, it’s all brand new.
that's funny~~haha~~' d, j4 H, w6 P8 q) h
keep it up~~0 @* |3 a+ F1 [9 J% f8 `. s9 n
cheers
that is great
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