[English]: Jokes..

小强

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1) A recent survey asked 100 sexually active men what they most enjoyed about a blow job
  Q% v8 s, v; \. {99.9% of them said, the 10 minutes of silence
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" r) R6 c, j2 g9 u+ v$ v: U, t2) Advantages of having an affair with a married woman?" }) I( ~2 `' \3 G0 f
a.They give like hell.
# h( G* f6 }/ p1 Xb.They do not yell.* q% G5 s, E/ C- k( x1 d* Q# H
c.They do not tell.
0 {' Z9 Y# d; h7 j; v1 b/ P$ fd.They do not swell and there is no wedding bell.0 ~! ]5 L$ p/ @1 @+ ~0 d( H
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3) A woman once said that a man is like a deck of playing cards. You need:
- u6 m( J" A  F4 Q- a HEART to love him,
4 f. E" U/ F1 G* K- a DIAMOND to marry him,
+ c4 S3 g$ G0 K! K9 G! @& N% ?- a CLUB to smash his head in, and
. U3 _4 D0 ]6 F. t% }' ?$ h- a SPADE to bury him!
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4) What is the similarity between a wife and a chewing gum?4 T# K3 e1 h) Z# S# ?3 X- f8 m
Both are sweet in the beginning and become tasteless and shapeless later4 P; e/ }9 ]" z( }2 \

4 d2 k; I! K) F3 B0 t5) What is the strongest muscle?1 g- e6 O. H; L
The tongue. It can raise a woman’s hip with just one lick!
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6) Why is the 69 position like driving in rush hour?# t5 X7 [) E; z* B5 h, x
The arse hole is always in front of you.
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7) What is the difference between a panty & a stage curtain?. c5 c- ?# t( C" _
When you pull down the stage curtain, the show is over.. but when you pull down the panties, it’s SHOWTIME!
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8) A divorced man meets his ex-wife’s new husband at a party. Later after knocking back a few drinks, he goes over to the new guy and asks him: So... how do you like using second hand stuff?! |! [  j8 ]7 N- i
The new husband replied: It isn’t that bad. Past the first three inches, it’s all brand new.